Question:

I was just saved last Sunday, and that day, our pastor gave a sermon about money that really hit home. My husband and I are in an increasingly worse financial situation. We have a six-week old baby, and I was fired in January for being pregnant. I just went through my bills, and realized that my gas is about to be shut off (probably today), and we will be without hot water and air conditioning, with a six-week old baby in the house. And, the rest of my bills (utilties and credit cards) are all very late. We can barely keep up with rent and groceries, much less the other bills. I got myself into debt a few years ago, and ruined my credit history, and I can't even open a bank account where I can cash my unemployment cheques. How can I tithe?

Answer:

Now, right now, call the YWCA and ask them to hook you up with a financial counsellor. The one thing that ALWAYS happens when you begin tithing, is you have 10% less money to be responsible for. Yes, many people are blessed by that -- I tithe, and it is a blessing -- but many of those who are blessed by tithing are living a good deal above bare necessity.

Give to God ... but no responsible pastor would be demanding 10% of your income when you're facing having no hot water to wash your infants nappies! A pastor -- a true shepherd of the sheep -- would be offering to stand beside you at the washtub scrubbing the baby-shit out of them.

There's an awful lot in your post, and a financial counsellor would help you make plans and consider options that you should be considering before your unemployment insurance runs out. The reason I suggest the YWCA is that 1) they are Christian; 2) they don't have a vested interest in convincing you that you should tithe; 3) they do have a vested interest in addressing women's problem's and many of your financial struggles are specifically problems that women face.

A good financial counsellor will help you get your cheques cashed. Financial regulations vary from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. In general, the bank ***on which a cheque is drawn*** *is obliged* to pay, in cash, the value of the cheque to the original payee. You could then just deposit the cash to your husband's account. Also in general, all banks must pay out all government cheques to the original payee, and you could hand over the cash. In both cases, you would probably have to show picture I.D., but the bank may not refuse to pay you. But a local financial counsellor can help you better than an internet stranger who doesn't even know where you live.

A financial counsellor might convince you that you'd be better off with your own drawing account, and help you set one up that's convenient. Credit Unions are a good option when banks fail you.

A financial counsellor might also help you find more efficient ways to cope with the costs of running a household that includes a baby. Many of those compromises *do* involve hard work (like using cloth nappies instead of disposables; connecting with a community kitchen to decrease food costs, and so on) but I get the sense you are willing to dig in and do what needs to be done.

Finally, a financial counsellor might help you negotiate financial priorities with your DH in a way that doesn't leave you and your baby vulnerable to spending decisions he might make. That may involve seeking compensation for your firing -- most jurisdictions don't allow employers to fire without just cause, and pregnancy in and of itself isn't just cause -- or considering ways that you can return to work.

God's Law never requires that we give to the point of harming ourselves or others, particularly if the others include a tiny baby who might go without necessities. Instead, consider offering tithes of time, prayer, and of the work of your hands; by volunteering at the church or in the service of prisoners, widows, orphan and the poor.