Question:

I have battled with depression a great deal of my life. My pastor told me that if I were a better Christian, I wouldn't be suffering this way. I am trying. I pray, I try very hard to live a good Christian life, although I know my walk with Christ is nowhere near complete. I am learning though and I feel I improve my relationship with Him every day. I really do try, but the pastor said if I were a good Christian, I could heal myself. This has now made me feel worse, because I feel now that not only am I failing in some aspects of my life, I am now failing in this most important part of my life. Is this true? If so, what am I doing wrong? I am so lost, and even though I will be trying to get help for this depression, if I can't heal myself, have I failed Christ too?

Answer:

Do you believe that people with cancer should have radiation and chemotherapy -- or should they heal themselves? ...

Should people who are poisoned have their stomaches pumped or be given an antidote? Should people with broken bones have them set? Would Paul have been able to overcome the "thorn in his flesh" if *he* had only been a "good Christian"?

Your pastor may be ignorant regarding what depression is -- many people are. Or, his theology may be dubiously grounded -- maybe he does think that people with all sorts of diseases and conditions could, "if they were good Christians", heal themselves. But it seems more likely that he believes that depression is just a severe case of unhappiness rather than a legitimate illness. And if that is the case, he should stick to preaching, as his medical training is severly lacking.

Depression is an unbalance in the chemistry of your brain. It is a real pathology rooted in your physical make-up. It can be treated and/or managed; however the counselling you're getting from your pastor would not be considered either treatment, or management.

You are by no means the Christian living with depressive disorders. I live with chronic depression that I am able to manage largely without drugs. Others here take prescribed drugs and have thereby returned to a more normal life. Others -- bless them! -- don't live with depression and don't look down on us that do, either! There is no more shame in turning to counselling, psychotherapy, or drug therapy to treat depression than there is in taking penicillin to treat an infection.

Your pastor -- no offence -- needs to be thumped upside the head. Talk to your doctor instead. God has granted mankind the ingenuity to develop effective treatments for brain-chemistry disorders. It is no part of God's will for God's people to suffer when treatment is available. Ask your pastor for a "blessing on the use of means" -- and then follow the treatment that your *doctor* prescribes!

Of course, when I say ask your pastor for a “blessing on the use of means”, I don't mean ask for his permission to get medical treatment! Blessing on the use of means" reconciles the idea of Healing Grace with the use of Medical Science. The phrase comes from the 1662 Prayer Book which uses the following prayer:

"O LORD Jesu Christ, Thou great Physician:
 Look with thy gracious favour upon this thy servant; 
 give wisdom and discretion to those who minister to her in
   her sickness;
 bless all the means used for her recovery;
 stretch fourth thy hand and, according to thy will,
 restore her to health and strength, 
 that she may live to praise thee for thy goodness and grace;
 to the glory of thy holy Name. Amen."

It's a false dichotomy to say that you should have to *choose* between modern medical care, and trusting in God. To say that seeking medical care shows a lack of faith is wrong, but it is equally wrong to say that medical science can take care of your illnesses without recourse to God's healing grace. The truth is, that God's healing grace acts through both the direct power of the Spirit poured out on the sufferer, and through the hands of the medical practitioner who is serving as Christ's hands in the world (often, even without seeing him/herself as Christ's hands).

When a community, or even just its elder(s) lay hands on a suffering member and pray for her healing, they are doing God's work too. But if they pray BOTH for God's mercy and healing, AND that God will empower the physicians and nurses, they heal the false dichotomy, and become partners with the medical staff, partners both in doing God's work in the world, and in providing healing care to the sufferer. That creation of a partnership is what I referred to as "blessing on the use of means". I think means will often work just fine without any blessing, but they are likely to work better *with* the blessing.

I in no means meant "ask his blessing" in the sense of ask his permission. And if he refuses to perform this pastoral office, I'd scold him firmly for refusing to provide pastoral care (and thump him upside the head). Actually, I'd want to report him to his superiors for counselling on how to handle such issues in the future, but since this is a non-denominational church, there's no-one to report his deriliction to. So I'd vote with my feet. And that's a terribly difficult thing to do when you're already struggling with depression.

I guess another option (especially since "non-denominational" usually means "congregational" which in turn means that the office of pastor is not a sacramental function) is just to ask some other members of the congregation who are more ... uhm ... ammenable to mainstream medical theory, to lay on hands and pray for God's blessing on the use of means.